The best piece of advice that my mother ever gave me was to have a back up plan, preferably more than one because shit does and will happen. Occasionally you can see it coming, most of the time you won’t. It will hit hard, fast, and with no notice whatsoever and generally there is not a damn thing you can do about it. Naturally, I don’t think she meant selling sex as a viable back up plan but hey – it works.
This is how I came up with what I call practical prostitution. All the posturing, theorizing, comparing, name calling, etc can be done but it doesn’t make my car payment and it doesn’t put food on the table. We can argue back and forth all day long about why this and why that and we should this and we should that but it doesn’t fix my car should the fuel pump go out.
I really don’t feel that it is necessary to go get a part time job, apply for welfare or a loan, or go back to college for a better paying job in the future simply because my vehicle needs new tires or because the plumbing in the bathroom broke and it’s going to cost me $2000 to get it and the drywall that got wet fixed (thats after the home insurance deductible mind you.)
There was a year a few years back where I was in some serious financial difficulties. I had a full time job that paid my bills. It didn’t leave much if anything for savings but I was able to live comfortably. I forget what started it all, probably a case of shit happens but I wrote a bad check (not on purpose, probably a case of oops I forgot to write down a previous check and didn’t deduct it in my checkbook). This led to a $35 fee assessed by my bank and a $25 charge assessed by the business I wrote the check for. Not being one to check my account balance every single day, another check bounced because of the $35 charge that I didn’t catch on time. Another fee is assessed by the bank. Ok, now I am $70 in the hole. My paycheck is an automatic deposit so now my account has $70 less than what my paystub is. I owe $50 more dollars to these companies than I thought I did because of their fees. The budget is tight enough as it is and rent is about to be due. Do you see where I am going with this? I’m starting to feel a slight panic mode here because I know that this can spiral downhill fast if not taken care of now but I still have two more weeks until my next paycheck. This time I purposefully write a bad check for groceries after I make sure the rent is paid and I pray. Praying didn’t work this time. Another $35 fee and this time the grocery store charged me $40 for a bounced check charge. Oh hell no. One date, $250, DONE. Caught up and back on track within one day. Hell, within one hour thank you very much. Did I feel exploited? Honestly I didn’t care, my bill had to be paid. Did I feel raped? Only by the bank.
It was during this same time period that my credit score was just sunk. It was a game of buy a few groceries today and let the car payment be a few days late. My credit report had so many late charges and sent to collection notices on it that it was just sad. If something bad really went down where I needed some type of loan there was just no way I could even borrow a freaking dime.
So I took one paycheck and instead of spending it on paying my electric, car payment, rent, etc. I rented an apartment and set up a temporary incall and signed a one year lease. Within one week I made more than my normal two week paycheck (remember I am still working full time at my regular job also so I only worked at the apartment a few days a week for a few hours at a time) and was able to get the bills that I neglected caught up. Afterwards, I was able to make enough to pay the expenses for the apartment with enough left over to pay off a credit card and get my car payment back to where it belonged. After that I was able to put some money into savings for the rainy days and treat the kids to a county fair that they had been wanting to attend for the past few years. Could I have done all this with a part time regular job in addition to my normal job. No, I was pulling in more with the part time gig than I was working at my full time job. Being paid in cash daily helped me to catch up quicker as opposed to waiting weeks for a check which in turn reduced any late fee’s I may have had. My credit score raised up to a workable level should the need have arisen where I would need a loan. For the first time in years I actually had ‘good’ credit. Money may not be able to buy everything but it does buy some stress free relief.
I know I’m not the only one. I remember reading stories of women turning to prostitution in Haiti after the earthquake. The needed to eat NOW. They didn’t care whether the abolitionists thought they were being degraded, de-humanized, exploited, blah blah blah. They were hungry and dammit you gotta do what you gotta do at the time that you gotta do it. Fine we need more opportunities for women, women need access to better education, women need this and women need that in order to not look at prostitution as a viable alternative for employment. That’s all hunky dorey but in the mean time are you willing to give every girl who needs it $5 for a sandwich to make it through today? I didn’t think so. YOU would then be broke and then what are you going to do when you’re fuel pump or transmission goes out?